I need to take this one to heart. I didn't go to my 10-year college reunion last month because I knew it would break my heart to see all those classmates and see how my "achievements" fall short. (I would have thought that certainly, ten years after having graduated, I would have a wonderful husband, happy children, etc...)
- Comparisons are always unfair. We typically compare the worst we know of ourselves to the best we presume about others.
- Comparisons rob us of precious time. We each get 86,400 seconds each day. And using even one to compare yourself or your accomplishments to another is one second too many.
- You are too unique to compare fairly. Your gifts and talents and successes and contributions and value are entirely unique to you and your purpose in this world. They can never be properly compared to anyone else.
- There is no end to the possible number of comparisons. The habit can never be overcome by attaining success. There will also be something—or someone—else to focus on.
- Comparisons often result in resentment. Resentment towards others and towards ourselves.
- Comparisons deprive us of joy. They add no value, meaning, or fulfillment to our lives. They only distract from it.
This list technically doesn't apply to me now, but if I were married, I'd print it out for sure!
- Choose joy
- Honor his wishes
- Give him your undivided attention
- Don't interrupt
- Emphasize his good points
- Pray for him
- Don't nag
- Be thankful
- Smile at him
- Respond physically
- Eyes only for him
- Kiss him goodbye
- Prepare his favorite foods
- Cherish togetherness
- Don't complain
- Resist the urge to correct
- Dress to please him
- Keep the house tidy
- Be content
- Take his advice
- Admire him
- Protect his name
- Forgive his shortcomings
- Don't argue
- Follow his lead
If we view today as less than tomorrow, we choose to live in the imagined picture of a story that hasn’t happened, sacrificing joy and adventure that could be ours in the present. We get caught in the idea that this is just the green room, and if we plan well and press on, we’ll eventually walk out on the other side and a great narrative will unfold.
Perhaps without meaning to, we tell ourselves, the world around us and even God that this isn’t enough. It’s as if we took a look around and said, “no thanks, I’ll pass and wait to see what comes up down the road.”
We cannot be sincerely grateful for our lives if we are breathing in the anticipation that soon this will wrap up and make way for something more exciting. That doesn’t sound like thankfulness, and it looks nothing like contentment…
Elisabeth Elliot wrote, “The secret is Christ in me, not me in a different set of circumstances.” The bigger story of our life begins the moment we understand this truth. Life does not begin when you get married, land your dream job or board a plane to travel the world. It is found in the beautiful, powerful love of Christ, which changes us in the midst of all circumstances, especially the ones we find most difficult. We need only be willing.
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