A profitable Saturday... It started out with a short run around a lake before the sun warmed things up too much. Then I did some grocery shopping, sent out some emails regarding the statewide event I'm coordinating, and filed my tax return.
I end the day on a frustrated note, however, for I received a discouraging email from the VP of the organization I'm in. She basically notified me that she's bowing out of her responsibilities now, before her term is up, citing that she'd "rather focus on her business and spend time with her family... thanks for understanding." I confess I started to cry as I read those words, for a couple of reasons. First of all, I can't use family for an excuse for anything in life, and it's a punch to the gut when others use that excuse with me. And secondly, I've put so much time into this organization during my term as president, with little help and much agonizing. I literally made myself ill last month with the stress of planning this upcoming event. If I had any inkling that it was acceptable to bow out of one's duties prematurely, I would have thrown in the towel after year one. But here I am in the thick of my second year, counting the days until September when this is over.
Am I being selfish? I only took on this responsibility because I needed the experience for my professional curriculum vitae. I shouldn't be throwing this pity party. I just need someone to put an arm around me and offer some word of encouragement! I feel so, so alone.
At the lake this morning, I sat on a bench after my run and read through some treasured psalms. The Lord knew I'd need those words for today...
Psalm 73:26
My flesh and my heart faileth:
but God is the strength of my heart,
and my portion for ever.
Psalm 27:13-14
I had fainted,
Psalm 27:13-14
I had fainted,
unless I had believed to see the goodness of the Lord
in the land of the living.
Wait on the Lord:
be of good courage,
and He shall strengthen thine heart:
wait, I say, on the Lord.
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