Holding hands with you in my dreams

My dear one, 

I have found a new favorite drink to fill the void left by my coffee abstinence -- I mix Tazo Decaf Chai Latte Concentrate with unsweetened almond milk and heat for a wonderfully comforting treat! I'm also loving Trader Joe's Harvest Blend tea (cinnamon, ginger, apple, orange, chamomile, hibiscus, etc.), and last autumn I stocked up with enough boxes to last me the year!

I had a dream last night that was so vivid that I weep now in recollection of it.

You and I were hiking with a group of mutual friends. At one boulder-scrambling spot, you turned back and offered me your hand to help me up. We spoke no words but the look between us communicated that we both felt the electric current of attraction. As the miles continued on, our hands met again and again -- for unnecessary reasons and increasing lengths -- until it was obvious to us both and to the entire party that this was something more, something real, something special.

You had a face, you had a name, but like in my real life, you say nothing.

I'm learning how to live with the silence, the wondering, the waiting, the hoping... I take it to the Lord in prayer and leave it in His hands. Your hand may never reach for mine, but He holds me in His hand forever, never to let go.

Psalm 139:7-10 
Whither shall I go from Thy spirit? 

or whither shall I flee from Thy presence?
If I ascend up into heaven, Thou art there: 

if I make my bed in hell, behold, Thou art there.
If I take the wings of the morning, 

and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea;
Even there shall Thy hand lead me, 

and Thy right hand shall hold me.

Isaiah 41:10
Fear thou not; for I am with thee: 

be not dismayed; for I am thy God: 

I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; 

yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of My righteousness.

Isaiah 41:13
For I the LORD thy God will hold thy right hand, 

saying unto thee, Fear not; I will help thee.

John 10:27-29

My sheep hear My voice, 

and I know them, 

and they follow Me:

And I give unto them eternal life; 

and they shall never perish, 

neither shall any man pluck them out of My hand.
My Father, which gave them Me, is greater than all; 

and no man is able to pluck them out of My Father's hand.

Rainy Tuesday ramblings

My dear one, 

One major reason I continue these letters is that they encourage me to articulate ideas swirling around in my mind. 

Today was one of those needed "unproductive days." I fulfilled my few Tuesday responsibilities at work, threw together a green smoothie, and collapsed on the couch for a four-hour "nap." When I awoke and scrolled through my Facebook newsfeed, I noticed that a good friend had tagged me on her link to a scathingly profound article by philosopher Roger Scruton. Both she and I are very much saddened at the pronounced decline in the quality of music promoted in our Christian circles, and Scruton's article, which addresses the larger secular community, makes similar observations. Referring to the banality of pop music, he laments:

"...You are rightly prevented from polluting the air of a restaurant with smoke; but nothing prevents the owner from inflicting this far worse pollution on his customers - pollution that poisons not the body but the soul."

And towards the end of the article he gives the encouragement to exercise and teach judgment:

"...The belief that there is a difference between good and bad, meaningful and meaningless, profound and vapid, exciting and banal - this belief was once fundamental to musical education. But it offends against political correctness. Today there is only my taste and yours. The suggestion that my taste is better than yours is elitist, an offence against equality. But unless we teach children to judge, to discriminate, to recognise the difference between music of lasting value and mere ephemera, we give up on the task of education. Judgment is the precondition of true enjoyment, and the prelude to understanding art in all its forms."

As my friend rightly commented, wisdom and discernment come from God alone. "Counsel is mine, and sound wisdom: I am understanding; I have strength" (Proverbs 8:14). The Lord demands our firstfruits (Proverbs 3:9-10), including the area of our musical choices (Psalm 33:3; Ephesians 5:19; Colossians 3:16). Anything less is an affront to the beauty of His holiness (1 Chronicles 16:29; 2 Chronicles 20:21; Psalm 29:2; Psalm 96:9). There is no room for cheap, tawdry distraction in the life of the dedicated servant of Christ. "...Whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things" (Philippians 4:8). My dear one, I can only hope and pray that you possess such discernment when it comes to your personal artistic preferences.

Eastern Coast of Iceland © 2012 Heather McGrath

I've been studying the book of Job. In addition to making my own notes in my new journaling Bible, I've been re-reading a Job commentary by Layton Talbert. One thought that has been running through my mind the past week is the insight Job makes in chapter 26, as he meditates on the glory of God as reflected in creation. Verse 14: "Lo, these are parts of His ways: but how little a portion is heard of Him? but the thunder of His power who can understand?" The ESV renders the first part of the verse, "Behold, these are but the outskirts of His ways, and how small a whisper do we hear of Him!" Talbert rewords Job's exclamation: "What we can discern of the infinite God from His works in nature and history are the mere coastlines of the continent of the mind and character of God." What a concept! My recent obsession with all things Icelandic has led me to some extraordinary landscape photography of the island (such as the coastline image in this post). When I meditate on the truth that the stunning revelations that God has given us in His Word and His creation are only the tip of the border of the magnificence of His glory and beauty, I can only fall on my face in worship as John did in Revelation 1:17. What a mighty God we serve! All we are and have is from His gracious hand. How can we give back to Him anything but our very best?

Only Christ can satisfy

My dear one,

I've come under conviction about holding you up, or even holding up the idea of you, as an idol without which I can't find true satisfaction. Though God has already picked you out for me (if you do exist), it will never not your job, nor is it in your power, to make me happy. Only the Lord Jesus Christ can satisfy the hungerings and thirstings and deepest longings of my soul.

Job 23:12
Neither have I gone back from the commandment of His lips; 

I have esteemed the words of His mouth more than my necessary food.

Psalm 34:8 

O taste and see that the Lord is good:

blessed is the man that trusteth in Him.

Psalm 36:7-9 

How excellent is Thy lovingkindness, O God!

therefore the children of men put their trust 

under the shadow of Thy wings.
They shall be abundantly satisfied with the fatness of Thy house; 

and Thou shalt make them drink of the river of Thy pleasures.
For with Thee is the fountain of life: 

in Thy light shall we see light. 

Psalm 42:1-2
As the hart panteth after the water brooks,

so panteth my soul after Thee, O God.
My soul thirsteth for God, for the living God: 

when shall I come and appear before God?

Psalm 63:1 

O God, Thou art my God;

early will I seek Thee: 

my soul thirsteth for Thee, my flesh longeth for Thee 

in a dry and thirsty land, where no water is.

Psalm 119:20, 103, 131

My soul breaketh for the longing

that it hath unto Thy judgments at all times.

How sweet are Thy words unto my taste!

yea, sweeter than honey to my mouth!

I opened my mouth, and panted:

for I longed for Thy commandments.

Isaiah 55:1-2
Ho, every one that thirsteth, 

come ye to the waters, 

and he that hath no money; 

come ye, buy, and eat; 

yea, come, buy wine and milk 

without money and without price.
Wherefore do ye spend money for that which is not bread? 

and your labour for that which satisfieth not? 

hearken diligently unto Me, 

and eat ye that which is good, 

and let your soul delight itself in fatness.

Matthew 5:6 

Blessed are they which do hunger and thirst after righteousness:

for they shall be filled.

Matthew 6:33
But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and His righteousness; 

and all these things shall be added unto you.

John 4:10
Jesus answered and said unto her, 

If thou knewest the gift of God, 

and who it is that saith to thee, 

Give Me to drink; 

thou wouldest have asked of Him, 

and He would have given thee living water.

John 4:13-14 

Jesus answered and said unto her, 

Whosoever drinketh of this water shall thirst again: 

but whosoever drinketh of the water that I shall give him 

shall never thirst; 

but the water that I shall give him shall be in him 

a well of water springing up into everlasting life.

John 6:35
And Jesus said unto them, 

I am the bread of life: 

he that cometh to Me shall never hunger; 

and he that believeth on Me shall never thirst. 

John 7:37 

In the last day, that great day of the feast,

Jesus stood and cried, saying, 

If any man thirst, let him come unto Me, and drink. 

1 Peter 2:2-3 

As newborn babes, desire the sincere milk of the word, 

that ye may grow thereby:
if so be ye have tasted that the Lord is gracious.

Revelation 21:6 

And He said unto me, It is done.

I am Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end. 

I will give unto him that is athirst 

of the fountain of the water of life freely. 

Revelation 22:17b 

...And let him that is athirst come. 

And whosoever will, let him take the water of life freely.

O Christ, in Thee my soul hath found,

And found in Thee alone,

The peace, the joy I sought so long,

The bliss till now unknown.

Refrain:

Now none but Christ can satisfy,

None other name for me;

There's love, and life, and lasting joy,

Lord Jesus, found in Thee.

I sighed for rest and happiness,

I yearned for them, not Thee;

But while I passed my Saviour by,

His love laid hold on me.

I tried the broken cisterns, Lord,

But ah! the waters failed!

E'en as I stooped to drink they'd fled,

And mocked me as I wailed.

The pleasures lost I sadly mourned,

But never wept for Thee,

Till grace the sightless eyes received,

Thy loveliness to see.

(B.E., 19th cent.)