Evening Prayer

Watch, O Lord, 

with those who wake, 

or watch or weep tonight, 

and give your angels charge 

over those who sleep. 

Tend your sick ones,

O Lord Jesus Christ; 

rest your weary ones; 

bless your dying ones; 

soothe your suffering ones; 

pity your afflicted ones; 

shield your joyous ones; 

and all for your love’s sake. 

Amen.

--St. Augustine (354–430)

I would live in your love...

I would live in your love as the sea-grasses live in the sea, 
Borne up by each wave as it passes, drawn down by each wave that recedes; 

I would empty my soul of the dreams that have gathered in me, 

I would beat with your heart as it beats, I would follow your soul as it leads. 

(Sarah Teasdale)

The confession of an honest soul

I'm crying over this aria today...

English translation of Onegin's first-act aria from Eugene Onegin: 

You wrote to me 

Do not deny it, I have read 

The confession of an honest soul, 

The claim of an innocent love 

Your sincerity is dear to me 

For it, I shall repay you 

By also telling the truth 

Straight as it is 

So accept this confession I submit myself to your judgement. 

Had I wished to limit my life with a burden of family, 

Had I been granted a good fortune to be a father or a husband, 

Then, having met you, I would look no further 

But I was not created for such indulgences 

My soul is not open to them, 

Your great qualities are wasted on me 

For I am not worthy of them, 

Believe me, in all honesty 

The marital life would be a torture for you, 

No matter how much love I had for you, 

The moment it becomes a habit, 

I would love you no more 

Then judge for yourself, then, what kind of roses 

Would Hymen have in store for us, 

And for how many long days. 

 

The dreams and years have fled away, and shall not return, 

I love you like a brother, yes a brother, 

And, perhaps, somewhat more tenderly than a brother would. 

 

So listen to me and have no angst 

Many times would a young maiden trade one passing dream 

For another one. 

(Translation by Stephen Ettinger)

A thankless job

My dear one, 

What a weekend it has been (the event I headed up for a statewide music organization). Without a doubt, the most challenging few days of my entire life... 

I don't even have the emotional strength to write about it all. Suffice it to say, I'm ready to get back into my "normal busy schedule." 

There's a saying: "If you want it done right, do it yourself." But in my experience this weekend, the saying should truly be: "If you want it done at all, you'll have to do it yourself, because no one is even remotely interested in helping you."

If you were here, I think I'd just bury my head in your shoulder and sob.

If you're out there, please pray for me. 

I feel more alone than ever.

Your Evenstar