Downtown Dreaming

My dear one, 

I found myself downtown with unexpected free time this beautiful Thursday evening, because my presence was not needed for the second half of a symphony rehearsal. So I walked around for a while, enjoyed the sunset view from the bridge over the waterfall, and ventured into a new gourmet deli for a light supper. After a busy morning and afternoon of teaching, followed by a hasty commute to the concert hall, the peaceful evening was a balm to my soul! 

If you had been sitting across from me at the little cast iron table outside City Hall, we'd have chuckled over the repetitive strains of the blues saxophonist busking across the street. We'd wonder exactly how much it would cost to take one of those carriage rides when we saw the horse clip-clopping up Main Street. You might have observed the glance I cast in the direction of the outdoor ice rink, and persuaded me to make my first iceskating attempt arm-in-arm with you. Perhaps you would have taken me to one of the cozy coffeeshops around the corner. One day...

Your Evenstar

Is it unreasonable?

My dear one, 

Just a quick note this evening as I'm waiting to meet a former college roommate for dinner. You're more likely to hear from me on a frequent basis if I don't put upon myself the high expectation of a lengthy missive.

I sometimes feel that it's unreasonable to pray for someone who loves the Lord with his whole heart yet can also love me despite my sinful heart. Someone who is not a pharisaical legalist but still stays away from alcohol, rock music, and movie theaters. Someone who thinks deeply and carefully about Reformed theology and fundamental doctrinal matters yet is not swept up in the popular worldly worship styles. Someone who speaks well but doesn't pridefully seek the center of attention.

And then there are the little things... Someone who will go to art museums and art galleries with me and hold my hand during the symphony concert and can also enjoy target practice with me or take me to a college football game. Someone who has good taste in fashion and personal style yet is not swept up in the materialism and immodesty of our culture. Someone who wouldn't think it crazy to jump in the car for a summer road-trip across the country on I-40, but is willing to do so on a shoestring budget. Someone who values the characteristics of a "Proverbs 31 woman" but will let me off the hook now and then from my kitchen duties and treat me to Taco Tuesday or Thai takeout. 

You'd be surprised at what I can put up with. I'm a relatively patient and forgiving gal. So, what do you say? Perhaps give me a chance?

Waiting still...

Your Evenstar

Trying to type on my phone tonight...

My dear one, 

I'm attempting this letter on my phone since I no longer have internet service here at my apartment. I should be in bed already (power snatches at the gym at 6am tomorrow...), but I'm sipping a decaf chai which tastes better than ever because I'm drinking from my new mug from a friend who owns the most delightful pottery shop in Oxford, England. 

It's been a music-filled week here. This past Friday night I played in a community orchestra patriotic concert – the highlight of which was Dvorak 9. Saturday evening was spent with my "Symphony Season Ticket" friends; the seven of us enjoyed a dinner potluck meal together and attended the performance of some Russian favorites. And this afternoon I rehearsed with an organist friend in preparation for services at his church next Sunday, then hurried back to my own church for choir practice. The upcoming work week will feel calm in comparison!

I ran a hypothetical scenario through my mind recently and it prompted some interesting developments. In this scenario you came home one day with a thoughtful and practical gift that showed your gratitude for my daily work in the kitchen: a memory foam rug to put under my feet while I washed dishes at the sink. After using this mat for a while I came to the point where I decided it was in the way, hard to keep clean, or something like that – and I wanted to remove it but felt afraid of disappointing you. 

This imagined situation helped me understand why I'm often reticent to give others a specific gift: I don't want to be the one giving an albatross. Because I often project negative responses onto those around me when running through hypothetical situations, I can end up paralyzed in inaction. "If I give So-and-so the gift of such-and-such, she might hate it, so maybe I should give her a nice gift card instead... but what if she thinks a gift card to be too impersonal?" I certainly hope I will be able to speak your "love language." Maybe not fluently at first, but with you giving me a few lessons I'm sure I can catch on quickly! 

I hate to end this letter abruptly, but sleep calls. Perhaps I'll attempt more regular letters. You are in my prayers. 

Your Evenstar